The NCAA Tournament Guide to College Admissions
by Luciano D'Orazio

Greetings prospective college freshman!

We know that choosing a college involves so many factors it can seem overwhelming. To which school will I be accepted? Is the campus urban or rural? Can I afford this school? How is the school's endowment? How's the school's cheerleaders' endowment? What are the chances of this college receiving NCAA sanctions in the near future that will irreparably damage any hopes of recruiting for the Big Dance?

Fear not, young would-be alumnus! In the spirit of March Madness, we've taken it upon ourselves to help you in your selection of the right college using this year's NCAA Men's Basketball Tournament selection. Who knows better about quality education than the NCAA, that paragon of sportsmanship that has shown the world such jewels as UNLV, Florida State and Minnesota (with its fine tutoring program!)?

To begin, weed down the 64 teams to a manageable group of 32 encompassing the best schools available. In doing so, it is best to be realistic and see where one can be accepted, but also to reach for the academic jewels that continually shine in this tournament. The first round of schools is a straightforward comparison of 2002 acceptance rates.

FIRST ROUND

Midwest

(16) Indiana University-Purdue University at Indianapolis IUPUI (73%) over (1) Kentucky (82%)
(8) Oregon (86%) over (9) Utah (90%)
(5) Wisconsin (60%) over (12) Weber State (100%)
(13) Tulsa (73%) over (4) Dayton (84%)
(11) Southern Illinois (78%) over (6) Missouri (80%)
(14) Holy Cross (43%) over (3) Marquette (83%)
(7) Indiana (83%) over (10) Alabama (85%)
(2) Pittsburgh (60%) over (15) Wagner (70%)

West

(16) Vermont (71%) over (1) Arizona (86%)
(9) Gonzaga (76%) over (8) Cincinnati (88%)
(5) Notre Dame (34%) over (12) Wisconsin-Milwaukee (78%)
(4) Illinois (62%) over (13) Western Kentucky (85%)
(11) Central Michigan (68%) over (6) Creighton (90%)
(3) Duke (26%) over (14) Colorado State (77%)
(10) Arizona State (85%) over Memphis (N/A)
(2) Kansas (67%) over (15) Utah State (89%)

South

(1) Texas (61%) over (16) University of North Carolina-Asheville (N/A)
(9) Purdue (76%) over (8) LSU (79%)
(5) Connecticut (62%) over (12) Brigham Young (73%)
(4) Stanford (13%) over (13) San Diego (53%)
(6) Maryland (43%) over (11) UNC-Wilmington (55%)
(14) Troy State (72%) over (3) Xavier (83%)
(7) Michigan State (67%) over (10) Colorado (80%)
(2) Florida (58%) over (15) Sam Houston State (70%)

East

(1) Oklahoma (89%) over (16) South Carolina State (N/A)
(8) California (24%) over (9) North Carolina State (59%)
(5) Mississippi State (74%) over (12) Butler (80%)
(13) Austin Peay (45%) over (4) Louisville (77%)
(11) Pennsylvania (21%) over (6) Oklahoma State (72%)
(14) Manhattan (67%) over (3) Syracuse (69%)
(7) St. Joseph's (55%) over (10) Auburn (76%)
(2) Wake Forest (41%) over (15) East Tennessee State (83%)

We now have a manageable group of 32 of the finest schools in America. The NCAA only selects the cream of the crop for its tournament, so the choice is still quite difficult, as the definition of cream differs from school to school (In Stanford it means a dairy substance; in Florida something else entirely). Thankfully, the good people at the College Board have the SAT to give a standard assessment of academic aptitude. The Second Round of selection will narrow the list to "Academically Rigorous 16" (Note: Where there is no reported combined SAT average for one or both schools in a bracket, we rely on acceptance rates for both.)

SECOND ROUND

Midwest

(8) Oregon (1102) over (16) IUPUI (981)
(5) Wisconsin (1265) over (13) Tulsa (1230)
(14) Holy Cross (1257) over (11) Southern Illinois (N/A)
(2) Pittsburgh (1202) over (7) Indiana (1096)

West

(9) Gonzaga (1171) over (16) Vermont (1142)
(5) Notre Dame (1350) over (4) Illinois (1273)
(3) Duke (N/A) over (11) Central Michigan (N/A)
(2) Kansas (N/A) over (10) Arizona State (1089)

South

(1) Texas (1222) over (9) Purdue (1134)
(4) Stanford (N/A) over (5) Connecticut (1149)
(6) Maryland (N/A) over (14) Troy State (N/A)
(2) Florida (N/A) over (7) Michigan State (1131)

East

(8) California (1300) over (1) Oklahoma (1173)
(13) Austin Peay (996) over (5) Mississippi State (N/A)
(11) Pennsylvania (1402) over (14) Manhattan (1090)
(2) Wake Forest (N/A) over (7) St. Joseph's (1210)

Now we have a manageable list of 16 of the toughest schools academically. If you want to go to one of these schools, the academic workload may be too much to bear, so it is best to see what faculty resources are available. To do this we have further whittled down the schools to eight, based on student/faculty ratio. It will best assess where one can get that extra attention one needs from time to time.

SWEET 16

Midwest

(5) Wisconsin (13-1) over (8) Oregon (18-1)
(14) Holy Cross (11-1) over (2) Pittsburgh (17-1)

West

(5) Notre Dame (12-1) over (9) Gonzaga (13-1)
(3) Duke (11-1) over (2) Kansas (19-1)

South

(4) Stanford (7-1) over (1) Texas (19-1)
(6) Maryland (13-1) over (2) Florida (22-1)

East

(8) California (16-1) over (13) Austin Peay (17-1)
(11) Pennsylvania (6-1) over (2) Wake Forest (10-1)

Hold on, bookworms! Today's elite colleges prefer well-rounded students. Students who will instill school spirit and involve themselves in numerous activities, such as pep rallies, homecoming games and "entertaining" young athletic recruits to land that letter of intent they so desperately need. So to further aid you in your search, we have taken these eight that are so academically rigorous and further reduced them to four, based on the number of on-campus organizations available.

ELITE EIGHT

Midwest: (5) Wisconsin (600) over (14) Holy Cross (94)

West: (8) California (300) over (11) Pennsylvania (300) [Tie broken based on total number of fraternities/sororities. Cal had 57; Penn 44]

South: (4) Stanford (600) over (6) Maryland (300)

East: (5) Notre Dame (270) over (3) Duke (200)

We now have a "Well-Rounded Four" of California, Wisconsin, Stanford and Notre Dame. It's useless to go to a school where students don't graduate on time. Nobody wants to be the 30-year-old sophomore — unless he's properly boostering the athletic department. Many of the schools cut in the early rounds lacked somewhat in this regard. But now it is time to select from these four the college of choice. So, we narrow to two, based on 4-year graduation rate:

FINAL FOUR

(5) Notre Dame (88%) over (5) Wisconsin (41%)
(4) Stanford (77%) over (8) California (51%)

Now that the final is set, young scholar, it is time to take into account the intangibles. First of all, can you possibly get into either of these schools. Does distance play a factor? Do you prefer bookish pseudo-intellectuals searching desperately for a cause to protest? Or do you prefer a cold, desolate place which only gets remotely exciting from September through (hopefully) early January? All of this plays a factor, but we need one final yardstick. As a nod to the good folks at the NCAA, the final yardstick is the number of scholarship-granting Division I athletic programs, so as to better assess where one can booster the best out of school.

CHAMPIONSHIP

(4) Stanford (36 programs: 18 Men, 18 Women) over (5) Notre Dame (26 programs: 13 Men, 13 Women)

So, there you have it. Stanford has arisen as your dream college, you college of choice. It was hard, tedious work, but I believe this to be the right choice.

("What?! Stanford my ass! You can't get into Suffolk Community College with these numbers!")

Note: All statistics from Princeton Review, CollegeNet and US News and World Report's America's Best Colleges 2003.

E-mail Luciano D'Orazio at loudogs1@aol.com.

— graphic by D.P. Barsam (barsam@hotpop.com)