Flak Magazine: Sports: Archives

The Ads of Super Bowl XLII | 02.04.08
Every ad from Super Bowl XLII, reviewed in realy time, by drunk staffers. Plus: The Bowl as seen from Britain. By Flak Staff

Who You Callin' A Faggot? The Curious Connection between Homosexual Rights and the Rules of Boxing | 01.30.08
Mike Tyson: psychotic madman, or heir of the proud tradition of the Spartans? By Con Chapman

The Bonds/Soprano Complex | 12.13.07
As the George Mitchell report on steroid use in Major League Baseball hits the public eye, we turn our gaze to the uncanny parallels between a fictional white mob boss and an all-too-real black slugger. By Alex Moaba

NBA Powerball | 04.24.07
Pacific Northwest lottery consipiracy or no, the NBA lottery is a special kind of gamble. By Bob Cook

Failure's Batting Order | 04.05.07
A preview of all the disasters Major League Baseball has on deck. By Bob Cook

The 2007 Bracket Report | 03.14.07
Gripes, injustice, oversights, blind prejudice and other fascinating aspects of the whole misbegotten NCAA tournament. By Bob Cook

Bears vs. Colts, Behrens vs. Cook | 01.29.07
We kick off the countdown to Super Bowl XLI with two Midwestern football partisans going head-to-head. By Bob Cook and Andy Behrens

Baseball's Big Strike | 01.18.07
Why a cranky labor stand-off from 25 years ago is still having an impact on the Hall of Fame. By Andy Behrens

Bob Knight's Bodyguard of Lies | 01.04.07
A debunkiriffic celebration of Coach Knight's 880th NCAA Division I win. By Bob Cook

Condiments and Condemnation: The Kansas City Blues (Part One) and also Part Two | 06.20.06
When is a hot dog with relish more than a hot dog with relish? When it's a symbol for a major league team that's being flushed into oblivion. By Stephen Himes

The Great Uniter | 05.04.06
Barry Bonds' true greatness lies in his ability to bring together all types of people. By Rick Paulas

Kirby Puckett: 1960-2006 | 04.28.06
Minnesota's greatest sports icon will be remembered for winning two World Series and playing baseball the way it should be played. He'll also be remembered for accusations of tabloid-worthy sexual misgivings. By Cary Broder

Winter Classic | 03.17.06
A road trip to Anaheim to see the second round of the World Baseball Classic casts America's game in a whole new light. By Eric Wittmershaus

The Battle for the Urn | 08.25.05
England and Australia duke it out on the pitch for the right to hold the mythical ashes of English cricket. By Louis Cooke

A Royals Fan's Dying Lament | 08.19.05
It's easy to lose your grip on sanity in the AL Central's deep, dark cellar. By Stephen Himes

The Miami Heat's First Spark | 06.06.05
As the guy who gave Miami Heat fans something to root for, Rony Seikaly, the team's original low-voltage star, deserves to revel in the thrills created by this year's contending squad. By Jason Feifer

The Thinking Man's Rebounder | 05.09.05
Behind the scenes of Kwame Brown's departure from the Washington Wizards on philosophical grounds. By John Kropf

Jose Does Hollywood | 04.05.05
Jose Canseco's ode to steroids undergoes an extreme makeover en route to its reincarnation as a 'roided out king of summer cinema. By Andy Behrens

Have Glove, Will Travel and Juiced review | 03.25.05
No two books more clearly highlight the passing of the torch from one generation of drugged-up baseball players to the next. By Mark Hayes

Superbowl XXXIX Epic Poem | 02.06.05
Tom Brady's no Prince Hal, but that doesn't make him any less deserving as a subject d'art. By Joshua Adams

Superbowl XXXIX Halftime Show | 02.06.05
Nobody watched it, but the folks behind the Super Bowl halftime show put together their best effort yet. By Nicholas Coleman

Superbowl XXXIX Ad Roundup: Operation Global Touchdown | 02.06.05
The post-nipple era of Super Bowl advertising has begun. And Flak is there to cover ad by every damn ad. By Flak Staff

L is for Lighten Up | 10.12.04
USA Gymnastics gets hot and bothered over an Abercrombie T-shirt, and Abercrombie laughs all the way to the bank. By Chris Sprow

If Empty Seats Could Talk | 10.11.04
When it comes to not showing up for a critical postseason baseball game, the Atlanta Braves's fabled absentee fans have plenty of excuses. By Jay Busbee

Hustle | 10.06.04
Rather than deliver a canned TV movie about Pete Rose, ESPN brought on a director and star who can sympathize with Rose's self-destructive compulsion. By Stephen Himes

Fish out of Water | 09.14.04
A struggling relief pitcher and an 8-foot-tall plush fish infuse the life of a 3-year-old girl with the magic of baseball. Disney is not involved. By Andy Behrens

Return of the Black Riders | 12.22.03
The NFL's future depends on the "dumbest team in America" wising up. By Robert McEvily

Beanballs over Baghdad | 12.18.03
The Montréal Expos and civil unrest in Iraq: Two tough problems. One simple solution. By Andy Behrens

Boys or Girls: Women's Basketball's Gender Identity Crisis | 12.10.03
Are women's pro hoops an early iteration of something exciting — or one of the sporting world's dead ends? Originally published in Flak print. By Andy Behrens

How Do You Leave Your First Love? | 11.12.03
The time has come to kick football to the curb. By Ian Schwartz

The Cubs' Cub | 10.15.03
Eventually, the cute train reaches its final stop. By Andy Behrens

Recovering from Rush | 10.06.03
The departure of Rush Limbaugh restores "NFL Countdown's" natural order. By Andy Behrens

Taking Responsibility | 09.29.03
Maurice Clarett and the lost art of fessin' up. By J. Daniel Janzen

Uncle Buck's Posthumous Crusade | 09.16.03
Major League Baseball Commissioner Bud Selig appears well on the way to letting Pete Rose back into baseball. But he's reinstating the wrong man. By Andy Behrens

Buying Happiness | 09.02.03
You can rail against the consequences of English football club Chelsea's free-spending ways, but in the short run, it's going to make for one exciting Premiership. By Louis Cooke

A New Kind of Red Sox Nation | 08.15.03
What lineup packs more promise than a slate of Ted Williamses, hitting 1-9? An exclusive report on the Splendid Splinter's missing DNA. By Andy Behrens

A Matter of Respect | 08.11.03
It's not what New York Giants tight end Jeremy Shockey said that illustrates the lack of respect for gays in America. It's what the New York Daily News printed. By Geoff Wolinetz

Wipeout | 08.01.03
In the end, when baseball is but a historical curiosity, Barry Bonds will have all Babe Ruth's numbers and that'll be all there is to discuss. By Andy Behrens

The Name-Naming Game | 07.23.03
Kobe Bryant's accuser's name is splashed all over the Web. Is it time for traditional media to reassess their policies on anonymity? By Bob Cook

The Unbearable Lightness of Cork | 06.05.03
Sammy Sosa pops the cork on an evening of good feeling. By Andy Behrens

And a Child Shall Not Lead Them | 05.13.03
LeBron James isn't yet ready to lead the NBA into a new golden age. By Andy Behrens

Coalition of the Winning | 05.06.03
The European nations that stand by the United States already have begun to reap the benefits of friendship: on the soccer pitch. By Luciano D'Orazio

March Malarkey | 03.20.03
How to win your office pool. Well, OK, maybe not. How about, How to amuse yourself in trying to win your office pool? By Flak Staff

A Nasty Curve | 03.01.03
The famously private superhero lefty Sandy Koufax's response to a report he is gay is regrettable and confusing. By Andy Behrens

The Fans' Spring Training | 02.13.03
Down and out at the Chicago White Sox fan convention. By Andy Behrens

Trottier's Trot Across the River | 02.07.03
The ex-New York Islander's stint as coach of the New York Rangers was doomed from the get-go. By Luciano D'Orazio

Super Bowl XXXVII Ads: Operation Infinite Ads | 01.26.03
An ad-by-ad look at our nation's economic prospects. By Flak Staff

Super Bowl XXXVIII Ads: Operation Grand Opening | 02.01.04
An ad-by-ad look at the Super Bowl's impact on the rebuilding of Iraq. By Flak Staff