A student walks into a well-appointed office somewhere in Back Bay, Boston.

Student: Hello?

Bespectacled Clerk: Yes, can I help you?

Student: Is this Project Bread? I'm here from Professor Augusta Carter's class to volunteer for the Walk for Hunger. I'm hoping to learn a little bit about how charitable foundations work.

Clerk: This is not Project Bread.

Student: But the sign said...

Clerk: This is Project Beard. I'm afraid two of our sign's letters have been transposed.

Student: Why don't you fix it?

Clerk: We don't have a budget line item for that.

Student: Well, anyway, this is the address on the card I've got... is there anything I can volunteer for, here?

Clerk: Sure, pull up a chair.

[The student does. Time passes.]

Student: Aren't I supposed to be doing something?

Clerk: No, not really. I'll let you know if things get busy.

[About a half an hour goes by.]

Student: Say, what exactly is Project Beard, anyway?

Clerk: I'm glad you asked. We help beardless men and women acheive full, lush, hairy beards. We give out beard-enhancing drugs and, when necessary, prosthetic beards. We also sponsor beard-related research. We also do our best to keep up with the latest in digital beard technology.

Student: Do you also help people who have lost their hair?

Clerk: No, that's somebody else's problem.

Student: That's a very specialized mission.

Clerk: That's how Dr. Elton would have wanted it.

Student: Who is Dr. Elton?

Clerk: Dr. Charles Elton was Project Beard's founder. In 1857, Dr. Elton, an English hay merchant and whalebone speculator, retired to Boston after years of commercial gain and moral dissolution. Vowing to leave a legacy that would outshine his own squalid life of mah-jong, wiffle paddling and opium-laced tea biscuits, Dr. Elton invested 1000 pounds sterling in a foundation for the treatment of those lacking facial hair.

He worked with an accountant to ensure that the money would be prudently invested, and set up a board of directors to make well-informed decisions about the foundation's long-term future.

Student: If you don't mind me asking, how much is the foundation worth right now?

Clerk: 553 million dollars.

Student: That's a lot of money! Your board must be terribly busy.

Clerk: Actually, the last member of the Board of Directors died in 1903. Dr. Elton explicitly specified that he was the only person able to name new board members.

Student: So, how does the foundation make long-term decisions?

Clerk: It doesn't. We have a one-person staff to oversee our current budgeted expenditures and handle other business-related issues. We also get the occasional volunteer.

Student: Ah. How does it feel to be the only staff member of a 553 million dollar organization with no board of directors?

Clerk: I'm not sure. I'm a volunteer. Our full-time staffer is on vacation right now.

Student: I'm leaving.

[The student stands up and leaves.]

Clerk: Don't forget to tell your friends about our inspiring work!