Fire Drills Of The World

AwoOOOOOOOOOGA! We've all heard of a Chinese fire drill... And for those of you so cast out from mainstream society that you haven't heard of one, it's fairly easy to describe:

Chinese Fire Drill: The car pulls up to a red light; all the passengers leap out, and get back into the car in different seats.

And so, in the interest of multicultural equality, we bring you these fire drills of the world.

French Fire Drill: Everyone gets out of the car, and then surrenders to the first BMW or Mercedes-Benz they see.

New Age Fire Drill: All the passengers in the car meditate on their crystals, and agree that exiting the vehicle would be a waste of bio-energy.

White South African Fire Drill: The passengers divide the car into two different sections, and make half the people get out and walk.

Jehovah's Witness Fire Drill: Everyone gets out of the car and starts distributing pamphlets to other cars parked at the light.

Hindu Fire Drill: Everyone commits suicide, and is reincarnated into a different seat.

Branch Davidian Fire Drill: All the passengers get out of the car, shoot at traffic cops, drop matches in the gas tank, jump back in, and lock the doors.

Russian Fire Drill: Passengers get out of the car, and then all stand in line to ride in the trunk.

Polish Fire Drill: Everyone gets out of the car and runs away, leaving the keys in the ignition.

Catholic Fire Drill: Everyone gets out of the car, feels guilty about causing a disturbance, and immediately gets back in.

Nazi Fire Drill: All the passengers get out of the car, beat up drivers in neighboring cars, throw them into the street, and then drive off.

Atheist Fire Drill: All the passengers refuse to believe the doors exist, and stay where they are.

Feminist Fire Drill: All the passengers see the car as a tangible expression of male dominance, get out of their seats, and kick the vehicle to pieces.

Zen Fire Drill: The car does not stop, the passengers do not got out.

Islamic Fire Drill: The passengers get out of the car, face Mecca, and then return to different seats in the name of the Holy prophet Mohammed.

Amish Fire Drill: All the passengers climb out of the horse-drawn buggy, churn milk into butter for 12 hours, and then climb back into different seats.